"Enjoy It While It Lasts," And Other Things I Hate Hearing as a Newlywed

I really hate, okay, maybe hate is too strong a word, so let me say, I deeply dislike when newlyweds are just living their joy, doing what new couples do, and some elders drop those casual remarks like:

"Enjoy it while it lasts."

"We’ve all been there."

"Remember, you’re the first to get married."

Excuse me? What kind of encouragement is that?

Instead of saying, "I’m so happy for you," or "Love only gets deeper if you nurture it," you choose to plant seeds of doubt? To smirk like you’re waiting for the "honeymoon phase" to crash? Yes, life happens. Yes, challenges come. But it’s your job as an elder to guide us, not to prophesy our downfall with some tired, jaded nostalgia.

Here’s the truth: Just because you went through struggles doesn’t mean we have to. Isn’t the whole point of experience to make things better for the next generation? If your marriage lost its spark, fight for mine to keep burning. If yours got hard, teach me how to soften the blows. Don’t just sit back, watch, and whisper, "Wait till reality hits."

To every young couple: Marriage is a daily choice. When you wake up, you choose each other, again. You repeat those vows, not just at the altar, but in the way you speak, listen, and hold each other when life gets heavy. Don’t let fear-mongering voices dim your light. There are couples married 50 years who still flirt like teenagers, who still light up saying, "This is my person." That can be you.

And to the unmarried: Marriage is beautiful. Not perfect, not always easy, but beautiful. Don’t let the bitter narratives scare you. Love with your whole heart. Fight for it. And if an elder tries to hand you their baggage instead of wisdom? Smile, nod, and write your own story.

Because some people don’t realise: The best "we’ve been there" should end with "...and here’s how we made it better for you."